Helping My brother

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Helping My brother”You’re shittin me.” I thought there was a punch line in there from my big brother.”I wish,” and he cast his eyes down. “Don’t know why I’m telling you this but you can’t share this with a soul. Sara, I don’t know who to go to. It’s embarrassing. Sue does NOT want to have sex with me anymore.”I did not know what to say. I mean Nick is just 31, how could this be? A good looking guy. I began thinking about Suzanne and there was always something a little cold fishy about her and I can’t say we were close. I love her as family but I’d have never picked her as a friend and never much understood what Nick saw in her, but what does anyone see in who they end up with, right? She was never mean or angry, she was great with her k**s. A good mother.”She told me she wants to show me her love in other ways.”I am a highly sexual person, probably more sexed than my husband. The idea of NO SEX hit me in the gut. “So, like what does that even mean?”He was leaning in talking quietly now, “She’s a good cook, takes care of the house. Good with the k**s.” He sighed, trying to make it sound reasonable, which it wasn’t. She says “I love you,” all the time. “But NO SEX!” He tried to shush me, my voice had risen a little to high.I was so engaged in what I heard, that it wasn’t until later this little voice was like, ‘why is he telling me all this?’ And I felt so bad for him, he obviously just was venting and needing to talk, but why me? Embarrassment with his buddies? I was the one person in the family who was closest to him, besides Suzanne. It did make sense for him to vent his frustration and confide in someone. “I should just go out and hire a hooker, get some ass!” After he said that he began to back track and wanted me to realize he was a real family guy and had no intention of getting divorced, which is true cause that is the kind of family we are. But still.I took his hand at one point and there he was tearing up.”Oh, sweetie.” My heart was breaking and I just held his hand. I felt bad, didn’t know what to say. He already swore me to confidence no way I could talk to Suzanne. But the wheels were turning in my head and what if my brother did go out and hook up with some woman, and everyone found out. He’d end up divorced and then his life is destroyed. When I got home I just couldn’t stop thinking about it. Would he ever bring it up again, and what would he do? I started to think about the fact he hadn’t had sex in six months, cause I believed he wasn’t with anyone else. I started thinking about if it were me. I’m highly sexual and I don’t know what I would do, actually I did. I wasn’t even consciously thinking this, but the seed of my feelings and compassion, was beginning to form what kind of release or happiness or whatever I could give? Be there for. It was not conscious cause I never would have admitted or accepted entering an i****t relationship. This wasn’t about seduction or anything like that, it was about family, love and caring for my brother; and being at a loss from knowing something nobody else did.————–Over the next week the things Nick said settled permanently in the back of my mind, never leaving my thoughts for long. The following weekend we were at his house and I was in the kitchen with Suzanne. I kept watching her and getting angry, angry at what she was doing to my brother. I kept looking at her and thinking ‘frigid bitch.’ And then feeling mortified with guilt for thinking that about her. She is a loving mother.While having dinner my brother was all smiles talking about a boat he had found and that he wanted to get it, trade in his old one. Another thing he and Suzanne did not share, but now she was all supportive. I would not have noticed this before, but in the past she would have stopped such a thing from happening. She hated the boat. Obviously she must have felt some guilt, and was trying to ‘indulge’ him in other ways.I kept wondering how I would ever bring this up with him again, a ‘how’s it going?’ or ‘you OK?’ seemed trite. I wanted to reach out and hold his hand. He would catch my eye, and this secret we both shared between us was right there.Could I? I watched him and felt such a warm feeling. Would I bring up the subject again, and how could I help? What was I saying? How would I ever be able to “help” him out with this. I had never had such a thought, but just below the surface I was aware. I went home that night unable to sleep. We could come to hate each other, it could destroy him and me and our family. I wouldn’t want that for him. He said he would be fine. Anyway, he’d never ask, and I would never bring it up. The next day he called me early and asked about breakfast this weekend and I said yes. Somehow our voices sounded different on the phone, this secret was affecting everything. When I hung up the phone my fingers tingled. It won’t come up anymore. He just wanted me to know. ——————I dressed up a little nicer for our breakfast. Wore a tight little skirt that showed off my behind, and next a top showing some nice cleavage. In my mind it was sort of just a little something extra, I could at least be nice to look at. I wanted to be real sweet to my big brother today. Nick was pretty quiet, but he never brought IT up. My heart broke looking at him. I had this feeling he wanted to talk to me, and just could not bring himself to say anything more. So there we were with this elephant between us.So, without context, I blurted out, “you could see a counselor, or the pastor.”It was the subtext of everything and he knew immediately what I was talking about. He met my eyes, permission to talk. He responded, “She’s never going to change Sara, and that’s just the way it is. Can you imagine if our pastor found out?””You’re. Right. But I mean…” I lost my voice, and my thoughts continued on silently. I was not going to go there.His eyes were so sad and I was convinced that he was feeling worse and my knowing, simply knowing, didn’t do nothing. Then he started to talk about it, “I thought it was weird when weeks became months, but still I thought maybe. But now, she is happier than ever.””Nothing?”Tears in his eyes again, “I love her Lisa, I won’t leave her, but…” His voice trailing off same as mine. “What are you going to do?””I’m going to be a good husband and a great dad and happy I got a job, and I will stay busy. She’s letting me get a new boat!””I’m worried you are going to end up making some really bad mistake, end up with another woman, and have feelings for her. It won’t all be solved so long as you have your needs.” My cheeks glowed as I said this, and did not even know how the meaning of what I said could be construed. But he kept looking at the table so I think it came out right.”I don’t WANT to do that.” And he gave a stupid little laugh and added, the last thing I need is ANOTHER woman in my life.” I took it to mean ME and Suzanne were enough for him.And Then I said, “If you EVER find yourself in a bar somewhere with some woman, and find yourself ready to start screwing around, you have to call me.”He laughed, “Now that would be something.””I’m serious, I can…” I paused to find the words, there it was again lurking in my thoughts, “… talk you down. Every time, talk you down.”We just laughed. I lay my hand by his, did not hold it then, just kept it real close. For some reason I felt guilty touching him.Then I got him talking about the boat and what he was planning to do, and what he would do to it and that he was going to dock it at Long Lake. He cheered up then.”That’s not so close?””It’s got the best fishing though.”The conversation trailed off after that, about fishing and hunting. When we finished I grabbed my purse.He saw me pull out my wallet. “No let me pay, s*s.” “No, sweetie I’ve got it.” I’d never called him anything but Nick, but somehow I felt so in his confidence. So close just then. It never came up before because we always went dutch. “Men don’t always have to pay for their dates.” I let my eye twinkle at him, so this was a date?We left and I walked with him to his truck, something else I had never done. As we said our goodbyes I gave him a nice hug and leaned up against his broad chest and kissed him on the lips. We let our lips touch together, nothing more. A little something. As I pulled away, I asked “Does she still kiss you?””Uh, she lets me kiss her, sorta.” He shrugged, “But…like we just done.”I felt warmth come to my face, I wanted to give him something more, but resisted. It would have been so easy.We left it at that and irrespective of my thoughts, and my feelings just then, there was no way. I looked at those broad shoulders, and the blue jeans he wore, the way they held low on his hips and his smile and his clean cut hair and the way he smelled, he slid into his truck. I can talk him down. I can help him stay on the straight and narrow. Is that what he wants though?Watching him drive off as I walked to my car. I worry about him.————————It was two weeks before we had breakfast again and this time he paid for our ‘date,’ and something else changed between us when he done that. Our breakfasts had become dates.He also seemed much more chipper, a real excited front, about everything and the k**s and the boat and how he had his money all together, but as we continued his emotions were draining out of him. He got a bit quieter, seeming more down.His eyes met mine, “I want to have one last time on my old boat before I get this new one, you want to go out fishing with me?”I felt a tingle, a something more. “You bringing Billy?” “Naw, he’s only six and I can’t get any serious fishing done with him. Suzanne didn’t want to go and I thought I’d ask. What about it?””Sure, but I got to check with Dave first.” I thought of asking if Dave could come too, but bit my tongue. I could tell he wanted just me to go. Also, both of us knew Dave didn’t like to fish but he would come if I asked. And second, I had a sixth sense Nick wanted to go with just me.Honestly, I was uncertain what to think, and felt I was reading way too much into my brothers request. My mind was getting all warped thinking about how he hadn’t been getting any. All we would be doing is fishing. My brother loves to fish, and truthfully he probably liked fishing more than sex, though probably not these days! In fact, the only person who loves to fish as much as him is me, and so that’s all we are talking about here. And I hardly ever get to go, and I have no boat. We used to go hunting together as well, but that too had fallen away. “Yeah, I’ll go.” I said. “I got to check with Dave. It’ll be fine.” So we were establishing quite a bit of alone time.In all the time we spent in the woods alone, my brother never laid an inappropriate hand on me, and this would be just the same. Still, all this time together in light of his situation was adding a risk. I felt it anyway. And all canlı bahis over again, a little voice in my head, what he would do if I offered myself to him. It was the first time I considered it so directly.And at the end I added, “I make a pretty good ‘other’ woman in your life. Liking the same things, I mean.” I blushed. That did not come out quite right, but at the same time I think he knew what I was intimating. I should have worded it different, but I knew he was lonely and I meant it as simply another companion. And I was now thinking of myself as the most “safe” woman he could be around. It’s not like he could take any other woman fishing with him without his wife flipping out.———————-The weekend of the fishing trip came and I was all butterflies, which made no sense at all. Getting ready I looked in my closet and decided to pack a few extra things, and to wear something nice, even if we were just going to go fishing. I felt positively wicked pulling on my panties, little red ones that made my ass look bare from behind, and I looked in the mirror at myself. Definitely my best feature. I turned back around and stared in the mirror, my dark shoulder length hair, nice breasts and thin waist. Good hips. They made me feel sexy. It was going to be nice and warm, I pulled on a nice tight fitting pair of jean shorts that were low on my hips, and didn’t bother with a bra. I put on a loose top that dipped between my breasts, almost too low and I wanted my midriff to show. I even added a little makeup to smooth out my skin, but no lipstick. In my bag I added some pajamas, but threw in an extra nightie that fell just below my butt since we’d be staying overnight. He told me he was bringing the tent. My brother would be here any time, and I was alone at the house with my stuff all packed, and my rods and lures ready. I kept thinking about what we were doing, and it felt illicit. The butterflies in my stomach made me all tingly. Just before he arrived I ran up the stairs like a little k** and grabbed my little yellow bikini. I hadn’t worn it since my Freshman year in Daytona.————————Waiting.Ultimately my plan was to have no plan at all. I assumed we would end up talking about Suzanne again. My thoughts kept getting corrected to ‘I’m just going fishing, nothing else.’ We would be staying a night, and that was something I hadn’t done with him in a few years. It was a big tent, and I remembered the boat had a little cabin in it. There was very little room in there. A table that could be converted into a bed. I let that thought rest in the back of my head. We can have some good talks, a nice heart to heart. Figure things out, maybe things are better. Maybe he is exaggerating. It’s not like I wanted anything to happen, but that was the thing constantly in the back of my mind, together with ‘Would I?’ I just know I love my brother and I’d like to help him however I can, if it included sexually, I did not know. There are a lot of things that don’t really rise to the level of sex. I don’t want to hurt him or me or our families. ———————We got out on the boat and at first fishing was pretty poor, but we moved around quite a bit and then it picked up. It was so beautiful, quiet and serene. It was later in the year, and the sun slanted low in the sky but it was still warm and there were no other boats on the lake. Everything was serene and it made me feel wonderful. He had beers and I had wine, and I was feeling really really good.As the sun got lower in the sky, I brought up he and Suzanne. Maybe it was the little buzz I felt but I held no punches. I shared my fears about him and Suzanne and that I thought it would be a mistake for him to see any other women.”I have no intention of doing that,” he said. I honestly believed him. But I added at the same time that I would not ever be disappointed if there was a time of weakness. I promised I would never be disappointed in him. I would understand. And if it happened he still needed to feel like he could talk with me. I was not laying all this out as my rules for his behavior and that all I was talking about was concern. I was not imposing anything on him.I also added my main concern was not necessarily about him being with another woman, but how some women are. “You do not want some skank standing in your front yard screaming for you to come out to her.””I’m not stupid.” The way he said that told me it had crossed his mind.It was kinda funny the way he said that, and it lightened the mood. I also reminded him of something he told me when I got married.”You remember what advise you told me when I got married?”He did not.I continued, “If you don’t feed your dog he’ll eventually run off to the neighbors to eat.” He laughed, “Cruel justice.”Here he had given me this ‘brotherly’ advice to keep my man sexually happy.He laughed, yeah he did rememberIt got quiet then, we had our poles in the water. It was nearing evening and we usually went to shore and cooked some of our fish. There was no wind, not a ripple on the lake. Perfectly still and silent. I was feeling good, and close with my brother. I gritted my teeth and added, “Well, I took your advice. My man is damn happy. I’m also done having babies, and sex for me is about expressing love and just having a good ole’ time.” I swallowed and added, “I want you to know I love you, I have always loved you, and… if you should ever NEED me to be there, I would be.”I was almost going to say, “I can be a pretty good neighbor.” But I bit my tongue. I think what I was offering was clear enough.I know he did understand. He was quiet a really long time. I watched him close out the corner of my eye. He was not angry. Finally, he just said “You are crazy, you know that.””Well, we ARE related.””I love you too.”————————-“Time for dinner.” We picked a nice cove with a sandy beach, opposite side of the lake from any of the public areas. The tent was secured at the front of the boat but we didn’t take it out yet. He took a stringer of fish and his knife off to a rock and cleaned them. I set up the grill and took out a basket with plates and cups, extra food and another bottle of wine. We found a spot where fires had been started before, and there were some logs set up around. It was the best damn fish I ever ate. I was still drinking my wine and he was still drinking his beers. As he usually did Nick started telling a stupid fishing joke.”A guy went fishing see. He caught an 8-pound bass on the first cast and a 7-pounder on the second. On the third cast he pulls in an 11-pounder when his cell phone rings. It was the doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in a terrible accident and was in ICU. The man tells the doctor to tell his wife he was fishing and would be there as soon as possible. Just his luck you know, best fishing he’d ever had his entire life. He decides to get in a couple of more casts before leaving and he ends up there the rest of the morning finishing with a stringer like he’d never seen. Then he remembers his wife. Feeling guilty, he gets to the hospital and asks about his wife’s conditions.””The doctor yells at him, ‘You went ahead and finished your fishing trip didn’t you! I hope you’re proud of yourself! While you were out your wife has been in the ICU! It’s just as well you went ahead and finished, it’ll be the last fishing trip you ever take! For the rest of her life she will require ’round the clock care. And you’ll be her care giver forever!’ The guy was feeling so guilty he broke down and sobbed. The doctor then laughs and says, ‘I’m just pulling your leg. She’s dead. What’d you catch?'””That’s truly awful.” And I hit him.”S’how I’m feeling lately. A little dark humor.””You’ll be fine. Everything has ways of working out you know.” I was pleased how he’d been looking at me, I felt so sexy today. My hair all windblown. I thought I looked my best when I was out in the woods, and wine can make me pretty horny. “You need to negotiate with her is all. There’s lots of different ways to have sex you know. She can give you a hand job, or let you titty fuck her!””Sara!” He laughed, surprised. “I didn’t even know you knew such a thing.””Well. She has nice tits.””Sara!”I was feeling tipsy and added, “Maybe not as nice as mine.” And held out my chest. Noting his eyes lingering on me. “You think so?” Acknowledging his eyes on me and inviting him to look. “On a scale of six to ten, what do you think?””You’re drunk.””Maybe a little.” And I spun myself onto the log behind him and slid up close, pressing my breasts against his back. “Just giving my big brother a little something. I just think you need some positive female attention.”In my state, I was feeling an attraction, I’d loved how he was looking at me today on the boat. Our naughty talk. Offering my brother a little sexual release would be alright I thought because I loved him, lust has nothing to do with it. I said real quiet in the beautiful stillness, “I guess I can see two sides to sex; There is the fun, loving, emotional and intimate part of sharing yourself with someone you love and then there is the kind of sex that is merely the satisfying, primal side of it that is more like a biological need like breathing or going to the bathroom. You just have to do in order to function properly. Even though it’s the same physical act. I could…be there for you, in some ways. It might sound bad, but …” I let my words trail off still pressing to him, rubbing his arm.He looked back at me, “You serious? You’re my sister, we can’t do nothing.””I don’t know about nothing. Nick, there ARE some things we can do.” I reached around his waist and gave him a hug. He groaned at the human contact. He turned toward me and, facing each other on the log, we hugged again. He lay his head on my shoulder and stroked my back, running his big hands over the small of my back, touching my bare skin. I let him, he felt so warm. I held him close, ran my fingers through his hair.”See. Feel nice?”He nodded. “Yes.””You’re heart’s beating so hard.” And I pressed myself to him. After a little while of letting him hug me I thought I would go for broke. I reached down between us, not looking at him and began to run my hands over his thighs. God he was such a muscular man, not like my husband at all. He did not let go, and I did not want him to see me as we touched. No one saying anything, no laughter, just the silence all around us. The sun ready to dip below the tree line.I broke the silence, in nearly a whisper, “You know I meant what I said before.””I know you did.”At those words I slowly moved my hand over his crotch, real slow and gentle. Gave a light squeeze. He did not move and I didn’t try to do anything else because I did not want him to freak out. He was in bluejeans so I could not exactly grab him, but I could feel he was hard. I just rubbed his cock through his jeans as bahis siteleri he held to me. I felt his hands wander down over my ass and rub me over my shorts. He cleared his throat a couple times, but nothing else. And he did not stop me. “Are you okay?” He laughs and says “I’m fine.” At that he reached down with his big hands, gripping my butt, and pulls me up onto his lap. “This is seriously stupid you know.” The way his steel blue eyes looked into me just then, it so turned me on, it kind of scared me. I hooked my legs around his to give myself leverage and ground myself into his lap. He held his hands on my butt, pulling me back and forth over his crotch, letting me basically give him a lap dance.That was not lost on him. He met my eyes and said, “I haven’t been completely honest with you. I had gone to the strip club a few times. But it made it worse. They don’t let you touch.”I was really feeling the heat of his body.”You can touch.”————————-His eyes ran down my front as I wrapped my arms around his neck to hold on. The invite. He let go my ass and as I leaned back he pressed his hands over my tits.God that felt so good.I was watching his hands, “You like that?””Hmmmm.”I continued to rock myself on him, could feel the rod in his pants.”I kiss too.” And I bent in and touched his lips with mine, gripping his lower lip with mine and sort of chewed on it. His eyes glued to mine the whole time. He kept his mouth shut, and I could feel the hunger rising in him. God he felt good, and I was conflicted. I could do this, but what was too much? I did not think it through, he was so hard. I imagined him inside me. Would that be right? I was cheating on my husband? It was just a blend of thoughts, and his mouth opening to me, I pressed myself to him as we kissed. Not gentle or sweet, but primal and hungry like I had said sex could be. I was whimpering, don’t think I ever felt such a man hold to me like this. He was strong, his hands were rough and big. He was a tall big man, and he was big down there too. Oh god, I whimpered in his arms, felt small and fragile.I don’t know how long we kissed like that, enough for me to nearly cum in my pants. We finally came up for air. I brushed a stray hair off his forehead, “Whew. You needed that,” I cooed. I was out of breath.”This is seriously weird, but yeah.”He let go of me, and it felt as if we were waking from a dream. I was still in his lap facing him, my hair all wild and my face flushed. He said, “It’s getting dark, we need to put up the tent.””Lets just sleep in the boat and anchor it in the cove. I like the sensation of floating.”————————–There was no argument.We did not pick up our stuff off the beach, it would be there in the morning. Silently we got in the boat and pushed it out, lay anchor. The water was no more than 5 feet deep. We made the right choice because in the next ten minutes it was pitch black with a million stars.Nick turned on a little light, that gave off the illumination about equal to a candle. He lifted a board and laid the cushions in place. It could be a table or a bed. It was not as small as a twin but not really full size. A little stiff, but I loved laying out in the boat and feel the darkness and the sensation of floating. He looked at me as the sheets and covers were put in place, and then he sat down on the bed, still looking at me.Not lost at all on what we were doing, and feeling the electricity around getting into that bed with my brother.”How we going to do this?”I answered, “I brought my pajamas.” In that moment I had a choice. My shirt and pants pajamas or my nightie. His eyes on me in that space, it took me a nano second to choose. The nightie.Rather than telling him to turn around while I got ready, I decided to just turn around. As he sat there I turned my back and, opening my top, let it drop off my arms. He could not see nothing, though he could see I was topless. When I dropped my shorts I heard a small breath from behind me, as I stood bent slightly in the cabin in just those red panties which basically exposed my bare ass to him. I reached in my bag and pulled on my nightie, a light yellow thin fabric that came just below my butt, my nipples were clearly visible through the fabric.I turned around, “Ready.”He had taken off his shirt, and god he looked good. He was in construction, and all that hard labor paid off, damn what that does to your chest. I could not remember the last time I had seen him with his shirt off.He asked, “OK, if I sleep in my underwear.”I said, “It’s fine.” Though as I said that I reached under my nightie and pulled mine off. “Mind if I don’t?”————————-The covers were a hodge podge of sheets and old blankets. It was not at all cool outside, in fact the temperature felt absolutely perfect against my skin. I slid in first and he went into a little bathroom. The Head. As he came out I was all tucked in and ready for him to get in. He paused looking at me, and I patted the bed with an innocent smile on my face. “Maybe we can snuggle a little.”He slipped beneath the sheet next to me and I turned toward him.”We can do this,” I said breathing out and wrapping my arms around his chest, suddenly feeling vulnerable and needing to place some limits. “But, we can’t have sex.””Of course,” he said as he slid close and lay his hand on my hip. It all felt like a dream to me.”Anytime you need a little release, honestly, I can be available.” I lay my head in the crook of his neck. “We can make this work.””I can touch you?”The way he asked it was so cute. I gulped, nodding my head.His hand slid along my entire side, he was feeling a woman’s body for probably the first time in months, and god it felt wonderful. I was a horny little vixen. Horny on a good day and this was plain crazy. I stretched and arced my back at his touch, and felt his hand slide around and grasp my breasts.”This OK?””You can touch as much as you want.” I reached out and grasped his hard cock, “Me too.”He turned the light out then, and I rolled onto my back with my arms up over my head. Feeling his hands follow me as I lay back, roaming over the top of my nightie and down my thighs. He was staying on top of the fabric. Wherever it lay he left it. Bare skin on my thighs he would touch and his hand brushed over the mound of my puss, squeezing me there and I moaned. God I was horny, I was picturing him laying on me and fucking. I could feel the rush of juices flood between my legs as his hands drifted up my body, my cunny instantly wet, and I could feel my pussy lips sliding together when I moved. My womb literally ached, and everywhere he touched me was hot and electric. My tits were hard, and my breathing was wild.He leaned in and kissed me, his chest pressing to me. I rolled toward him and met his passion. In the blackness we kissed, and I could feel the weight of him, his bare powerful chest. I reached around his back and whimpered like a kitten. I could not believe how I felt. I could sense the flicks of light in his eyes, feel his breath on me, his grunts and for how powerful his body, how gentle his touch. As we spooned I could feel my nightie ride higher, up my thighs, and I honestly did not care. When it had risen above my hips, I was waiting for him to explore my body some more.Would he be surprised!And his hand wandering low suddenly felt the bare skin at my middle, tracing over my navel, he rubbed his hand down over the curly hairs of my golden brown pussy. Squeezing a hand between my legs and drawing his middle finger through my slit. I tucked my hand into his underwear and grasped his cock, it was fucking thick and I literally ached to have it inside me. I turned and pressed my entire body to him, feeling the hardness of his cock trapped between us as I rubbed my bare pussy on his thigh. He reached around and grasped my ass, running his fingers through my crack, and down between my legs from behind. I could not stand this, I was ready to cum. His whole body had me on fire, it was beyond anything I had ever felt before. It was so dark, like a demon in the night had me. Only flecks of light, of his teeth and eyes.His voice was so deep and low, “You are so beautiful Sara. So beautiful.” This b**st, like out of a dream.His kisses and the way he could bend me to his body. I loved this strength. I was literally melting, he could do anything to me. Anything at all. My body making it impossible to think.And I rolled him onto his back, and got up on top. Wanted to feel that cock between my legs. As I sat on him I lifted my nightie over my head and off. He reaching up and grasped my breasts. I leaned down and pressed them into his mouth. He began to suck and chew on me as I gave my hard nipples to him. Oh, how does he know what I like, how I like that. His mouth was so firm, and his teeth on me, I was being marked. Molded to this body beneath me. My legs spread wide over his hips and felt my lips press onto the fabric covering his cock, the only thing separating us, as I undulated against him letting my hair fall down around his face. The heat of his body, his smell all around me. My voice sounded so strange, since I was talking to my brother. “You a pretty hungry boy.””Oh god Sara I needed this. I needed you.””I’m here.” And then as if I had no thoughts left added, “You’re little fuck toy. You need a little toy to play with?””Oh, Oh yeah.” His mouth filled with my breast as he groaned, suckling me. My little boy suckling me.I lifted myself up onto my knees and tugged at the underwear, pulling it down to his thighs and he kicked them the rest of the way off. This was getting dangerous. I settled back down and felt my pussy lips spread wide over the girth of him. My juices bursting out of me, literally puddling in his groin. I reached back and grasped his balls, this bull beneath me. God this cock inside me would be so incredible. I slid myself up and down its length, his heaving breath beneath me. If it were cold I would see steam bursting from his nostrils, this bull I was riding, my legs held as wide as I could, letting him split me down my center. He was holding me up by my tits and I could literally hold my arms out and ride. Up and down, along the length of his shaft, letting my clit grind and sc**** along the veins of his cock. His cockhead catching as I slid back and tipping myself forward to give my clit better pressure, oh god, my breath left me as I lay down on him skin to skin.”You are amazing,” I panted into his mouth as I kissed him, my mouth was wet and so hungry. I plunged my tongue into him and wanted to fuck him any way I could. Permission.What would he do if I said he could fuck me? Would he stop? Oh God, Could he? How would we feel tomorrow? I said I would give myself sexually to him any time he wanted. How drunk am I? Is this a mistake?I continued to kiss him and press my breasts to his chest. We were moist, our güvenilir bahis bodies wet and warm, our skin sliding together as I rocked on him and he cradling me, holding me. Caressing me, loving me.I posed it as a question, “Anything you want? Anything you want to do to me?”His eyes opened, I could see the whites of his eyes, his mouth on mine. Kissing me, our naked bodies sliding together. This hunger. He did not answer.His mouth nibbling a line along my jaw, he began chewing and kissing my neck. Tingles burning down my spine, oh god, I continued, “You want to fuck me don’t you?”He said nothing, deep groans. Conflicted. I could feel him continuing to kiss my shoulder, and then suckling my tits again.”I can feel it. You can tell me, tell me if you do.””Sara. I just …” giving way to silence.”It’s alright. I understand.” I continued to rock and slide up and down the length of his cock, and bringing myself forward let it spring up between my legs. Then slid back again catching that beautiful cock pointing straight up between my legs, and lifting myself, almost like a crouching cat. Riding his beautiful cock letting my ass rise and fall, up and down as it pressed vertically between my legs. The pressure of his cock as I rode him this way was loaded like a spring wanting to snap back against his abdomen. The way he was bent out and the way I moved, made it press right in over my vagina and catch with each thrust.”It’s all right, I cooed. It’s all right. Tell me what you want.” I wanted it, but was waiting for him. Say yes. Oh god, he felt so good.And then this deep guttural moan, “Let me fuck you.””You’ll be OK. Tomorrow?”I held my vagina right over his tip. Held myself right there for him.”Yes. Please. Yes. Sara.” I positioned myself and said, “Push.”I opened my legs as he raised his hips, working that cock in, lifting one leg higher angling myself for him. Could feel his cockhead open me, pressing me wide open. The pressure on the walls of my cunt. Oh god he was stretching me, oh god I had never felt so full. My whole body opening up as his cock plunged deep inside and I sat down into his lap. Lifting myself, letting my cunt impale itself once more. I could feel it bump deep into my womb, and when I sat upright I swear the head of his cock pushed right into my belly.All the air went out of us and I fell onto him, he wrapped his arms around the small of my back, tugging me down. We acclimated to each other. His cock molding to me, and my pussy opening and stretching, bending his cock. We were one.”God you are so tight Sara.””You are so big. Oh….no idea.” And I began to grind myself to his body. This piece of clay inside me. I slid my clit hard into him and his hands reaching round my thighs and between my legs, touching himself feeling his cock as it slid in and out of me. He began pumping into me, faster and faster, grunting and fucking me hard, lifting his whole body to meet me.”Oh, put it in me,” I panted.He was pumping into me so hungrily, the desire was making me crazy. I had never felt such a lust, and his movement in me. I swear I could feel every vein of his cock itching me, scr****g into me. Opening me. Stretching me out from the inside. Oh, god it was crazy and I was so turned on. I began panting and wriggling my clit, digging deep into him, riding hard against him and kissing him. As I rode, began shaking my hips against his cock, scratching such a delicious itch. And my body so hungry. Yes. I want this. Yes. could feel myself cumming. “Oh, baby, sweety, my love, I’m cumming.” He grasped me and pulled me tight. “Oh you fucking me. Fuck. Fuck.” And my body fell forward against him, as I filled with a white light. My entire soul was set fire, and I began to cry out, panting and crying. “Oh sweet jesus, you fuck. Oh fuck. Yesssss!”I could barely breathe, barely knew where I was when, as I held to him, he lifted me right up and rolled me onto my back and lay on top, his cock still inside of me. He was thrusting into me so hard. I was trying to hold my legs as wide as I could, my knees rising on each side of him, he felt so big. His entire body falling on me, plunging inside and rising like a billows, this steel cutting into my body, completely filling me in this darkness. We were glowing now, embers, or so it seemed. My arms raised and I was pushing myself down, as his thrusts lifted pounded me into the bed. I felt as if I could see him. His glow. And it hurt, and I was grimacing and panting, “Ah Ah Ah.” Too sensitive, each thrust. I was always oversensitive after I’d cum, and I could feel I was going to cum again, and it all felt so exquisitely painful. Almost too much, too much. But I was not going to stop this, it hurt with such a delirious confusion. I was lost, time was ended. I could feel his breath on me, fucking me with such abandon. I did not know where I was. A sea of foam.I needed him to cum, and I began cooing in his ear, “Cum in me baby. Cum in me lover. cum for me. Let me eat your cum.”This stream of words.”You are mine,” he would groan. “Mine.” “I’m yours, anything, you need me. Need your little fuck toy.”And he growled, “You are MY FUCK toy.””Yes. Take my cunt. It is yours. Yours. You can put your hands in my pants any time you want. You want me, you want this cunt.””Oh Sara, god, I….””No panties today. Fuck me, yea. Come on. You like my pussy, Give me your cock, I want it, put it in me. So deep, ah, ah, ah Cum in me.”Frantically he pounded on me, oh god, I was going to break. I could not go much longer. I was trembling and my body was about to explode. I was in such agony. His body was going to shatter me into pieces. I could feel him stiffen and trembling, his whole body rigid. I was a glass that was vibrating and ready to explode, and his body trembling, clinging to me.”Cum in me baby. come on. Yes. Come on. Oh yeesss, I’m cumming.” Holding my legs so wide. Holding him to me. My whole body melting, an agony so deep inside. I felt like the back of my body opened right up and he was falling right through me. Oh god. “Oh baby, I’m filling you.” He held himself rigid over me, the weight of him and our bodies pressing together. My orgasm falling together with his, and then the ribbons of cum. Oh my fucking god. I could literally feel the cum filling me, pressing into me. God, I was swelling. His cock plunging into the fire, plunging into the sea, my salt sea. His cum quenching and his body falling against me. I was clawing his back and kissing his neck, biting his shoulder. A shudder, silence. I was looking up into the silence and….He fell to my side. I couldn’t breath. Could not catch my breath. Motherfucker!We did it. After seven months, my brother fucked.Me.————————After what must have been fifteen minutes of simply returning to consciousness, breathing, saying nothing, I sat up and turned on the little light. The covers were everywhere. A mirror behind the little bar showed my reflection, and from the tits up indeed I was glowing. My eyes were on fire and my hair looked like Medusa. I was the fire eater. I was life. I looked over at Nick, and with the covers pulled back, there his cock lay red, shining with cum, across his thigh. He was looking at me, not bothering to cover himself. The little boat floating in the midst of the heavens. I poured a brandy and then a second. I handed one to him, and downed mine in a single gulp.I had never been naked in front of my brother, and now I settled back against the pillow in that little bed without the least compunction of covering myself. My golden pussy matted with juices, his and mine, my belly streaked with sweat. My lips swollen and bruised. My breasts so deliciously full, so sensitive from being chewed and sucked. I had never been fucked like this. What that does to a woman is hard for a man to understand.I was marked. Stained. It is indelible.I poured another brandy, and sipped it this time.He lay a hand on my thigh stroking me softly, brushing his fingertips into my bush.I looked at him and smiled. He said, “Thanks, I guess.” Looking at me with puppy dog eyes.I patted his head, “I did not plan this and, I feel weird saying this, you are fucking incredible.”———————–The light went out, and I lay back next to him, my brother/lover. My mind swaying uneasily between those two points of light.I could feel him breathing softly, he had fallen immediately to sleep.Me, not so easy.Sex is not so casual as I had been letting on, or convincing myself. Sex alters you, the most meaningless sex has meaning. I thought about what I had said, and wondered what would require correction, editing. How does one establish a sex life with their brother? This just happened. It did and it didn’t. I was not wooed. I was and I wasn’t. It still felt like a dream from which I would wake. Did I say that? I said he could put his hands in my pants anytime he wanted. I said I was his fuck toy. Christ. I had offered to be his release as in he can fuck me in the future, and I wondered. Wondered about how I had opened myself so completely, to let him tap his root into my soil. They have a way of growing, of hanging on, gripping and growing into my heart. Altering us as we grow together. I let him inside me. He would be in me now, forever. Forever and ever. Once it enters it does not leave. Every man I’ve had sex with, there is something that remains. I love my brother, want him to be happy. I lay my hand at his back, sleeping like a baby, and ran it down over his ass. We both have nice asses, damn. I began reliving our breakfasts, and times with him, fishing. Wrestling. Picturing his smile, fishing. When was it we changed, when had I decided to have sex with my brother? Because I had chosen. My want was like nothing I’d ever felt, it scared me. The more I thought about helping Nick, the more I wanted to. What does he think really? I want Nick to know I’ll love him no matter what, if this never happens again or if sometimes it does. Should this be a regular practice? I don’t know how it can be.With Nick? God, how could I possibly satisfy two men. I truly had not thought this through. It wasn’t the i****t. I’ve never felt anything with any of the other family men in my life. But this was so fucking hot. I grew up in a house full of men all except for mom, and living in the country where I was the only girl for miles around. So these men were all I had, and in a way I AM abnormally close to Nick. Is THAT i****t?As far as cuteness goes, my cousin was cuter, and yeah I actually did crush on him. My uncles were mean drunks, but that’s different. The age difference. Nick rolled onto his back and unable to help myself I ran my fingers through the dark bush of his crotch, let the wiry hairs catch between my fingers. He is so delicious, so powerful, and these were the feelings which worried me. I would fall in love with him, was in love with him, and want this. Want this inside of me. Want to feel this again, again again and…I am getting wet, can feel it.I lay back down like that with his thick cock wrapped in my hand, feeling the pulse of its heart beating.To be continued

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